Funtime Ben’s Unflappable Hiccup Cure

Still here, although after a particularly bleary night out, I got the hiccups and decided to perform my unflappable hiccup cure with unexpected results.

h4. Funtime Ben’s Unflappable Hiccup Cure(R)

* Slice of lemon
* Sugar to taste

Bite on that sunva-bitch. There, that’s it – your hiccups are gone… *if not seek medical attention.*

So, while preparing my unflappable hiccup cure I inadvertently (almost) sliced the tip of my left index finger off. Oh god it was a tense few minutes as my hypochondriac upbringing kicked in.

bq. “I need a chair! I think you should call the hospital I feel dizzy. Wait, I’m feeling better.”

Funtime Diane rushed about the house fashioning me bandages and turnakits from unused newspapers and paperclips McGyver style! I could tell you all about the 45 minutes where I was bleeding all over our kitchen, but instead I’ll flash forward to right now where I advise if you’re going to cut a month old lemon with a tough skin with a dull fillet knife… don’t.

Thank you for your time.
_This has been a public service announcement from_


p(update)=. Finger seems to be healing up nicely! Can’t wait to get back to my guitar.
! Finger)!


4 responses to “Funtime Ben’s Unflappable Hiccup Cure”

  1. What?? No gory pictures? I wanna see some blood.

  2. I was very close to taking some pictures of my Frankenstein Finger, but I thought that much of my readership may not appreciate my butchered nub. As always I should have consulted you first Ree. It's looking much better today and the gangrene is spreading nicely.

  3. funnnnnnnnnnnnyyy!

    but we all know that you just made up this story

    so that you would have content for your website!

  4. ouch! :/