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Funtime Ben’s Unflappable Hiccup Cure

Still here, although after a particularly bleary night out, I got the hiccups and decided to perform my unflappable hiccup cure with unexpected results.

h4. Funtime Ben’s Unflappable Hiccup Cure(R)

* Slice of lemon
* Sugar to taste

Bite on that sunva-bitch. There, that’s it – your hiccups are gone… *if not seek medical attention.*

So, while preparing my unflappable hiccup cure I inadvertently (almost) sliced the tip of my left index finger off. Oh god it was a tense few minutes as my hypochondriac upbringing kicked in.

bq. “I need a chair! I think you should call the hospital I feel dizzy. Wait, I’m feeling better.”

Funtime Diane rushed about the house fashioning me bandages and turnakits from unused newspapers and paperclips McGyver style! I could tell you all about the 45 minutes where I was bleeding all over our kitchen, but instead I’ll flash forward to right now where I advise if you’re going to cut a month old lemon with a tough skin with a dull fillet knife… don’t.

Thank you for your time.
_This has been a public service announcement from_

_keepfilletknivesawayfromdrunkpeople.com_

p(update)=. Finger seems to be healing up nicely! Can’t wait to get back to my guitar.
!https://www.upthetree.com/wp-uploads/IMG_1681.jpg(Cut Finger)!

4 replies on “Funtime Ben’s Unflappable Hiccup Cure”

I was very close to taking some pictures of my Frankenstein Finger, but I thought that much of my readership may not appreciate my butchered nub. As always I should have consulted you first Ree. It's looking much better today and the gangrene is spreading nicely.

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