For all those keeping score out there, I do not enjoy people like this and more so because well quite frankly he sounded like an asshole. My friend then mentioned that my wonderful girlfriend was moving in with me at the beginning of April. This is when, I will call him Turd, Turd decides to go on a tirade on how women are terrible and suck the life out of you.

“Oh, don’t do that. If I could take back my relationship I would.”

This post is to express to all of you people who feel the need to put your horrible relationships, the relationships you are in because you are a weak and incapable of being proactive in your life, on us people with relationships that work. While he was going off about how women are terrible, I couldn’t help but think how lucky I am to actually like my relationship. If it’s so bad Mr. Turd, why the hell are you in it? RIGHT?!

And so I speak to all you people out there look at your relationships and if you hate them, either fix them or leave them, but don’t put your relationship on other people because quite frankly it makes you sound sad. I have news for you, relationships,marriages , and friendships should make you feel great, not horrible. But some people have lost sight of that fact. So I urge you all to say, next time you are around someone is is bringing you down…

“Dear people who suck,

No thank you.

Sincerely,
Someone who doesn’t”

That about says it all.

Well if you’re waiting for an update to Up The Tree, well… they still happen… occasionally. But if you would rather keep tabs on me in fairly regular annoyingly sparse detail, why not saunter over to twitter and follow me? You’ll get all the information you are dying to hear, including how often I eat, how bad my indigestion is when I eat, and what sort of things I think about while I’m eating. I know, I know, you’re welcome.

Be sure to say hi if you do – I will almost certainly add fans… unless your name starts with “Just” and ends in “Josiah”

ZING!

So why dont you do yourself a favor and get a Gravatar and then comment about how I never update the podcast.

Feels good to vote, although I am totally nervous about the outcome. C’mon America, don’t be dumb.

These kids were too young to vote, but decided to take their beliefs to the streets, urging people to vote because they couldn’t.

So a few of you have commented that the site is now in the default WordPress theme Kubrick. You are right. I noticed the other day that the site, now 6 years old, was loading the homepage in 30 seconds. I wasn’t sure what was making the site slow, so I went back to the default theme and low and behold 1 second loading time.

Is this making you hot ladies?

I am going to redesign the site eventually, but until then you can enjoy what this blog used to look like in 2002… old school.

As many of you know, I have been taking classes at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre and performing comedy in New York for the last two years. I’ve stayed mostly quiet about this because, well, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with comedy. You guys all know me as the funnier half of Tracks Up The Tree (BECAUSE I AM THE FUNNIER ONE), but I haven’t really talked about my comedy on this site. Until now.

I’ve realized that comedy is one of the few things I really enjoy doing (other than needlework) and I have been purposefully avoiding talking about it. Partly because I have seen comedy as a hobby as way to pass the time between painful relationships, but also because I didn’t really know where my comedy fit into my life.

So the other evening, I realized that I want to talk a bit more about what I’ve been doing on this website. Talk about the projects I’m working on, write a bit more about what it’s like being a performer in New York, and let you all in on what I have been doing with my life for the past 2 years. In short, up the tree is going to be my weblog again. I will be posting more about my life and less about the stuff I never wrote about before. Sure I will talk about music and the podcast will continue with it’s same irregularity, but from now on Up The Tree is all about me – a performer, designer, and generally dreamy guy in New York.

…and needlework.

Fo’ reals

The most depressing thing so far has been the calorie counting food log my temporary personal trainer is making me do. I say temporary because I really can’t see having a personal trainer for an extended period of time — the gym is expensive enough without having to pay a lady with a thick neck $160 additional a month. I write what I eat and the approximate calories. This has made eating food like a game of Battleship, where each carrot stick brings me closer to sinking my own… battleship. The unfortunate part it has made eating annoying. I don’t always want to do calculus every time I want put something in my mouth.

So as much as I would love to keep a lady on my beck and call, especially for those moments when I need to open a particularly stubborn jar of pickels, I think she’s history after the first month. Plus she might say something about the on demand Rocky Road.